6 Types of ‘It’s Complicated’

We’re taking a break from my travel posts to make way for another article for Cebu Daily News (CDN). It all started on one of those evenings where we were hanging out at Frontgate over a couple of beers. Anyway, after talking about one of our favourite topics (boys), Jude Bacalso offered to publish my “11 guys you meet in Cebu”. I was over the moon! It felt surreal to see my boys on print for the first time. Thanks Ma!!

He asked me if I had anything in the works so I brought up the other list I was working on- more boys and complicated relationships. Next thing I knew, my piece was on the center spread.

It’s not as funny or tongue-in-cheek as “11 Guys You Meet in Cebu” because well, it’s complicated. Since we’re talking about types, the article features Typography Art by design genius Karl Adrian Aguro.

Read on and enjoy.

Let’s face it. Nothing in life is ever simple. Especially for us females. We tend to blow things out of proportion and add drama at every turn. Sometimes, we read too much into every little gesture and get highly emotional over everything. Add into the mix a complicated setup and well, fireworks. So, it’s my pleasure to present the 6 kinds of relationships that don’t necessarily end with a happy ever after.

1. Friends of Ex Just because things didn’t work out with your guy doesn’t mean you can’t hang out with the boys right? Yeah sure, that’s fine unless you totally have a thing for your ex’s best mate. That’s when the situation gets sticky. Are you sure you wanna get into that? More often than not, you lose. Ever heard of the saying ‘bros before hoes’? Bro code right there. Before you dive into a relationship with a friend of your ex, make sure you are both in for the long run and face the challenges together ‘cos everything is ‘bout to get complicated to the next level.

2. Ex of Friends We girls have a similar saying, ‘sisters before misters’. That’s our girl code. So your bff’s ex is definitely a no-no. The way girls are, you most probably know every single detail about this guy from the good and bad habits, romantic gestures and of course the dirty details (TMI!). If you still manage to fall for the guy then make sure you talk to your friend first. If your girl says go that’s great but things are gonna be awk-weird. If she says no and you wanna fight for your love then go ahead. It’s gonna be you and him against the world.

3. The Barkada Boyf At some point in our lives we’ve had one. You know. The guy in your group who gravitates toward you and treats you differently. The one who gives you extra attention, takes care of you, brings you home, watches over you when you’re wasted. He somehow remembers your favorite things to do, food, songs, everything. If he were actually interested in you, he would be considered romantic. If he happens to be good-looking then it’s a plus. But he’s just a friend. That’s it. No declarations of love. It stops right there. No crossing that line. You go on with your life thinking ”What if?”. But will you make the first move knowing that if things don’t go well, the barkada dynamic will forever be changed?

4. The Work Spouse It’s the same situation as the previous one but this time he’s the great guy at work. He could be happily married, almost married or perfectly settled but that doesn’t stop you from basking in his attention. He’s an all-around nice guy. Friendly, respectful, hardworking, dedicated, a perfect gentleman. He gives you that extra spring in your step at the workplace. You find yourself showing up or sometimes even organizing after-hours drinks and karaoke or weekend outings with your officemates just to spend a little extra time with him.

5. The Chatmate It started off as a joke. Then days of constant communication flows into a month. Eight years later both of you are wondering what in the name is going on. Wondering where and when will you guys ever meet. In the past you used to laugh your conversations off and blame it on spontaneous insanity, now the general state of emotions is one of wistful longing. You are now the expert at World Time Zones. Selfies aren’t just for vanity purposes but a gesture of ‘Wish you were here’. You have become the epitome of the phrase ‘burning the phone lines’. In this case, it’s Skype or WhatsApp. So what’s next? Well, someone’s got to book that ticket.

6. The Superfriend You can’t go wrong with friends right? Far from it. The superfriend is the ultimate complicated relationship. It’s friendzone to the highest level. Like infinity gauntlet level kind of super. You start off as friends. Hitting it off right away. You suddenly spend a lot of time together. A lot of time meaning every single day. You text each other all the time. You hang out with each other’s friends. You’re attached at the hip. People tease you. How can they not? You guys are adorable. Perfect for each other. But hey, you’re just friends. Then you start to fight. He starts to get jealous that you’re so busy. You start feeling awkward (wait, is this jealousy? hell no) when he flirts with someone else. But you’re still just friends. You have a dare-kiss moment or even worse drunk-kiss or let’s not even go there. Things get weird. But seriously, you’re really just friends. He tries to tell you something, like how his favorite lyrics remind him of you or how he drops that L word. You laugh and tell him he’s crazy. But then you feel guilty and buy him his favorite thing as a gift. Then you hug and make up. You’re still just friends. Then one day, he tells you that he’s found someone. He asks you what you think. You once again laugh and remind him that you are just friends anyway. His face falls, a hurt look in his eyes. He nods and smiles. It’s sad really. It was a smile that ended your friendship. But oh well, you were just friends. Right?